Gift Ideas- Funny Tee Shirts from Wireless

I love to read slogans and witty remarks on tee shirts. I’m not much of a shopper, but when I take relatives to local Texas Hill Country towns, I’m content in those shops with all the tee shirts hanging up. I hit the jackpot when my Wireless catalog arrived last week. It had 100 interesting and funny tee shirts. Tee shirts, especially clever ones make great gifts for Christmas, Birthdays or any occasion. Check out these shirts. One is sure to be perfect for your friend or relative.

More Cowbell (Will Farrel, Saturday Night Live spoof of Blue Oyster Cult)

The Donut Whisperer

You’d Make a Wonderful Dread Pirate Roberts

Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die. 

Mr. Bill Ohh Nooo!!!

No Soup for You!  (Seinfeld)

Dammit Jim!  (Star Trek, Bones)

Know Your Spock (Good Spock, Bad Spock)

I want to believe (X-Files)

Bite my shiny metal ass!  (Futurama)

Universal Studios Monsters (Frankenstein)

Universal Studios Monsters (Bride of Frankenstein)

Gojira (Godzilla)

Librarians improve circulation

Books, Books, Ahhh Books (Snoopy with stacks of books)

The dog ate my lesson plan.  (Dog pictured)

Don’t make me get all iambic on Y’all!  (Shakespeare)

Books.  Cats.  Life is sweet. 

So many books, so little time.  (Person holding large stack of books.) 

Everyone Needs a Happy Place…Mine is Reading a Book

Will talk books with anyone

How to Throw Your Bag (Golfer with diagram instructions)

How to Break Your Club (Golfer with diagram instructions)

Who 1 (Baseball jersey)

What 2 (Baseball jersey)

Idontknow 3 (Baseball jersey)

Will talk sports with anyone

There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast (Picture of cat with clock overlay)

Cats for Peace (3 cats making peace signs)

Dogs for Peace (3 dogs making peace signs)

My favorite child is furry and has four legs.

Cats humor us because they know their ancestors ate ours. 

Peace love dog (tie dye shirt with peace sign, heart, paw print)

Dogs don’t need 9 lives because they get it right the first time. 

Aged to perfection

This is what a really cool grandma looks like

This is what a really cool grandpa looks like

So far this is the oldest I’ve ever been. 

21,915 days old, but who’s counting?  (60 years old)

18,263 days old, but who’s counting?  (50 years old)

14,610 days old, but who’s counting?  (40 years old)

Forgetfulness is a sign of genius.  (I forgot who said that.)

You know that Social Security they keep taking out of your paychecks?  Well, it’s going to me!

Searching for the Meaning of Life But will settle for my car keys

Life is uncertain.  Eat dessert first. 

Everyone has to believe in something.  I believe I’ll have another piece of pie. 

When life hands you lemons, make lemon bars.  Lutheranism

I’d be a vegetarian if bacon grew on trees

I cook with a flair for the dramatic, and depraved indifference to calories. 

Reduce Waist (measuring tape around waist)

Wine improves with age.  I improve with wine. 

TEE SHIRTS FOR MUSIC LOVERS

Without Music Life Would B (flat music notation)

“Well man it looks like we’re hopelessly lost at C!”  (music notes)

“I love your accent!!”  (music notes) 

TEE SHIRTS FOR FISHERMEN

I listen to the voices in my tackle box.  (fishing lure)

On a Clear Night, I Can Hear the Fish Laughing (2 fish laughing)

The Fish Whisperer

WORD TO LIVE BY TEE SHIRTS

Never moon a werewolf

To err is human.  To arrrr is pirate. 

It is what it is (Snoopy laying on top of dog house)

TEE SHIRTS FOR GARAGE AND CAR LOVERS

My garage needs me now.  The least I can do is be there for it. 

I make stuff

I’m a toilet away from the perfect garage

Will talk cars with anyone

GEOGRAPHIC REFERENCE TEE SHIRTS

West Coaster (depicting states)

East Coaster (depicting states)

Southerner (depicting states)

Midwesterner (depicting states)

TEE SHIRTS FOR THE KING OF THE CASTLE

Handyman’s Rule:  Cut to fit, beat into place

This Guy needs a Beer

Avid Indoorsman

Reclining Chair (chair with diagram of parts)

Here’s to Physics!  Second-class lever (bottle and bottle opener)

Just resting my eyes…

Still plays with Trains

This looks like a job for…Someone Else (over logo like Superman)

TEE SHIRTS FOR THE SMART AND GOOD LOOKING

Why can’t I be rich instead of good looking?

It’s a burden always being “the cute one”

This is my little black dress.

It’s a burden always being “the smart one”

Some people have a way with words, other not have way. 

Please hold your applause until I conclude my remarks. 

Someone you never really liked has added you as a friend.

Pole Dancer (folk dancer pictured)

Old Army (logo like Old Navy)

Watch your attitude (aviation instrument)

Mile High (aviation instrument)

Halfheartedly working, wholeheartedly hoping to win the lottery.

Everyone remain calm, I’m an Accountant

[Chinese lettering for “I am huge in China”]

[Chinese lettering for “I’m with stupid” and hand pointing]

I’m with stupid (Einstein pointing both ways)

i before e except after c weird?

Squirrels for Peace (4 squirrels pictured)

Paddle faster! I hear banjo music.

Today’s forcast Morning I’m up, isn’t that enough Afternoon Periods of irritability throughout the day…..Evening 90% chance of the same tomorrow (sun and moon faces)

Often confused with my evil twin

Those that can do. Those that can do more teach.

I think it’s stress (zebra stripes unraveling and falling to ground)

Prayer The world’s greatest wireless connection.

See more funny Tee Shirt slogans in my hub, Funny Tee Shirts from The Lighter Side.